My Favourite Accessory
by Logan
You're too much cologne — overbearing and not the least bit complimentary. I dunno if you know it, really. I'm certainly not going to enlighten you to the fact that for as much as my things amuse you, you're the amusement. The gold-plating, the novelty diamond cufflinks, the leopard print satin lining beneath the charcoal-silver three-piece pinstripe. A thrift store Bedazzler.
In other words, you're very me.
Essentially, questionable taste and very annoying, but I make you look good — the only one that does. A little self-awareness might go a long way, Toru, but it's not nearly as fun.