Participants:
| Scene Title | Circling |
|---|---|
| Synopsis | Colette opens up to Ygraine about what happened to her in October. |
| Date | December 7, 2009 |
"Hi there, shorty. As requested - a phone call. Give me a call back if you'd like to do something tonight." Thumbing the button to disconnect the call, Ygraine shakes her head at her cell phone, grimacing. "«I hate voice mail»", she mutters in French.
It was a pretty straightforward message for Colette to get, and if she wasn't so terrible at checking to see when she gets calls, she might have even returned it in a timely fashion. Driving from Staten Island back to Manhattan is a long and obnoxious drive through the outskirts of New Jersey and back around into New York. The noise and distraction of the long drive out typically gives Colette a lot to think about, and less time to do things like check phone or even hear them ring.
Four hours and a hot shower later, she finally notices the flashing light on the front of her phone where it sits on the coffee table of her father's apartment. Grabbing the phone and settling down on the sofa, Colette kicks her feet up and flips it open, immediately her brows furrow at the reception.
11 Missed Calls.
A tired groan slips out from the girl as she rubs her free hand over her face tiredly. Thumbing through the numbers, one in particular stands out. Sure, she could check her voicemail, but the far easier — and far lazier — thing to do is just call back whoever it was and ask them; kills two birds with one stone. And that is exactly what Colette intends to do as she clicks dial and settles in on the sofa to the sound of the ringing in one ear.
Just before her own phone clicks over to the answer-phone, Ygraine slightly breathlessly snatches up the receiver. "Hello?", she uncertainly greets, while peering at the caller ID. "Oh! Hello there. I was thinking you weren't going to call back", is swiftly added, a smile in her voice. "Where are you?"
There's a roll of Colette's eyes as she slides downa long the sofa, kicking her feet up on the armrest instead of the table. "At my dad's place, sorry uh— about that. I was driving around Staten Island when you called, didn't even feel the phone vibrate. So, um, s— sorry about that." There's few people who can make Colette sink back down into that old apologetic and sheepish attitude that she once had, Ygraine is among them.
"So, what's up? I'm actually not scheduled to do anything for the next couple of days. Actually, yeah, I'm not really busy until Wednesday, so you caught me at a good time!" Lazily turning her head to the side, Colette eyes the television remote on the coffee table next to her, but simply can't be bothered to stretch to reach for it. That's just too far at the moment.
Ygraine laughs softly. "Stop apologising", she gently chides. "We'll have to see about getting you a helmet hook-up for the phone. Let people pester you more freely whenever you're out and about." That smile sounds like it's turned into a mischievous grin.
"And I'm glad that you can fit me into your busy schedule. I wondered if you'd like to do something tonight. Clubbing, catch a movie, tell me about your life… whatever you like, really." In the background, it sounds as if Ygraine now has the phone wedged against her shoulder, and is doing some sort of tidying or clearing up as she talks.
Something makes Colette go silent for a moment, just slouched against the sofa, brows knitted and teeth toying with her lower lip. "Uh, yeah we— I guess we could go out and do something. I mean— that's not such a bad idea. I um, did… did you have anything in mind? I— I'm a little hesitant about the idea of clubbing or something right now, I just— I haven't been in the mood for anything like a party in a long time. In fact, I… I haven't really gone out anywhere in a long time, not unless you count volunteer work as going out, anyway."
Shifting awkwardly on the sofa, Colette stares off into the distance, looking at the bowl of dog food across the living room. "My dad's going to be home soon from work, so… I should probably get out of here anyway before he gets back. Do— did you have anything in mind? I really don't feel like being around a bunch of people right now, if I can help it, but I don't mind something quiet. I just— I'm terrible at making plans, s'why I like the people I work for telling me what to do."
Ygraine falls worriedly silent for a few moments, even the sounds of motion halting as she frowns mutely at her phone… before finding a cautiously cheerful voice with which to reply. "I could treat you to dinner and a movie up here, if you like", she offers gently. "Though I'm not sure what you'd make of my DVD collection. We could rent something, I suppose. I think I still have a valid club membership around here somewhere…. Or…"
The Briton pauses, biting her lip as she tries to work out some eloquent way of phrasing her offer, before settling upon "if you prefer, I could put on a serious hat and just let you talk, if that'd be better…."
"Oh you're— " Colette laughs a bit awkwardly, "Why'm I spending minutes on my phone if you're right upstairs? We'll figure something out, I'll be right on up." Not leaving much room for maneuvering on that, Colette clicks her phone closed. No real need to say goodbye in her mind, if she's just a few moments away. The teen quickly hope up off of the sofa and tucks her phoen into a pocket, then sock clad feet take her across the room where she grabs her messenger bag and jacket, quickly donning them both before just grabbing her boots with one hand and carrying them with her. No sense in putting them on if she's just going to take them off once upstairs.
There's a hesitant look to the sound of a whine from the kitchen, and Colette offers a mild smile towards the old, gray-muzzled dog looking up at her with dark eyes. "Dad'll be home soon, Jupiter… I'll be right upstairs. Bark if you need something." It's a bit of a sassy retort to the dog, but it seems to ease a little bit of Colette's guilt about leaving him behind again.
Stepping out into the hall, the young girl looks back into Judah's apartment, closes her eyes, and shuts the door softly. One of these days, she's going to have to tell him what she's been hiding.
Having been left no choice about when Colette arrives, nor more than a tiny amount of time in which to prepare the apartment, Ygraine duly answers the door a few moments later - barefoot, clad in lycra shorts and top, and smelling rather of sweat.
"Come in, come in", the Briton says, attempting to usher Colette inside, and into the living room - that smells somewhat of air freshener. "Would you like a drink of something?", she asks, gesturing towards the kitchenette - the work surface of which shows signs of a home-made fruit smoothie in the making, with a part-chopped apple and banana resting upon a board, some pieces already chucked into a blender.
Carrying her shoes, Colette offers a half-hearted smile on the way in, looking more tired than she let on during the phone conversation. "Huh? Oh ah, yeah sure, whatever that is your making would be fine." There's a wrinkle of the teen's nose as she looks towards the blender in the kitchenette, followed by the clunk-thunk of her shoes being deposited on the floor by the door, one of her mis-matches socked feet pushing the door shut.
"Agh, I feel like I didn't get a minute of sleep last night. I fell asleep on the couch at the Hangar and just— not the most comfortable thing." Following Ygraine inside, Colette only now notices the Brit's attire. Colette, to her own credit, looks a little more put together, even if it's the same black denim and sweater outfit Ygraine saw her in just a few short days ago. "I didn't bug you in the middle of something, did I?" Green eyes drift over to Ygraine as she makes herself at home and wanders in to the living room, laying her messenger bag down on the sofa.
Ygraine cracks a grin as she pads through to the kitchenette. "Grab a seat. And I can give you something less wholesome, if you like. I'd about finished the workout when you called, and was just sorting myself a drink." She shrugs rather sheepishly. "I'm scaling back on the workouts now. Still feels like slacking, though, to do less than a couple of hours a day, but… it lets me eat less, too."
Quickly chopping up the remaining fruit, she drops the pieces in the blender but leaves the noisy machine turned off for the moment. "The Hangar - that's one of the Sailing Club places, isn't it? And… d'you want to tell me why you're glad to avoid your Dad, or should I leave that subject alone?"
Furrowing her brows, Colette offers a side-long look to Ygraine from by the sofa. "Oh uh— it— " there's a small squint offered, "The thing with my dad's nothing…" She murmurs dismissively, meaning it's exactly not nothing. "Yeah the— the Hangar's one of our places. Um, I— probably shouldn't be talking to you about that until, like, Scott or someone has brought you in officially." COlette's head quirks to the side, dark hair hanging down over one eye. "Which means I should probably talk to someone about that, I guess…"
Circling around from the couch, Colette is glad to slip away from the topic of what's going on with her. "Yeah uh, I— get kinda' famished after working out too. But you probably do way more than me anyway…"
Ygraine cracks another grin, then laughs softly. "Probably. I'm afraid that I've never thought you look like you're in serious training. But if you'd like some advice on it, I can certainly help. The spare bedroom here's set up as a gym, as it happens. I had that done when I moved in, so I could stay in shape more easily."
Setting about adding a few more ingredients to the blender, she keeps at least half her attention upon the shape on the sofa. "So… do you want to tell me about what's got you so stressed and worried that you're not talking to your Dad again?"
Wandering in to the kitchen, Colette tucks her thumbs into the pockets of her jeans, socked feet scuffing on the floor with lazy steps as she walks. The offer of help and discussion of exercise just falls away when Ygraine brings up the latter sentiment. Colette's green eyes avert to the floor, brows tense and teeth toying with her lower lip as she comes to rest her shoulder against the refrigerator, offering Yraine an askance stare.
"I…" The look in her eyes is a bit haunted, it's not one that the Brit is familiar with from Colette. "I just— don't want to— " She can't put her words together, and it makes her anxious, uncomfortable, unable to wriggle out of herself exactly what she wants to say. "It's complicated," is the excuse she uses instead.
Ygraine pauses, lifting a brow as she turns her head to focus upon Colette. "Oh, yeah. And what we've talked about previously has been soooo simple", she observes. "I just spill my guts about figuring out how to come out of the closet and being Evolved and the nature of discovering your abilities and all the other fun and happy things that we've spoken about."
Gently shaking her head, she turns to try to take hold of Colette's shoulders and peers directly into the younger girl's eyes - sparing a moment for inward marvelling at being able to meet the gaze of both of them. "Come on. Aren't you meant to trust me?", she asks gently. "Is whatever you have to worry about at the moment really any worse than what you've told me in the past?"
"Yes." It's not a tone of voice Colette's ever taken with Ygraine either, and if the Briton hadn't seen the pained look on her face and the way she turns away. "It's not— I just— " Clearing her throat, she reaches up and rubs one hand against the back of her neck. "I… this isn't just— " A frustrated noise erupts from Colette as she slams the heel of her palm against the refrigerator at her own inability to voice what's bothering her.
Turning to look back, regretfully, at Ygraine Colette rubs her fingers against her palm and offers a slow shake of her head. It's an unspoken apology for the outburst. "Sorry…" Comes the murmured vocal end of that look, and Colette's turning her back on the Brit, arms wrapped around herself. "I just— can— can we… talk about something else?" Because after this that won't be awkward at all, no.
Ygraine blinks in surprise, face crumpled with worry - though Colette's visible pain removes the risk of her feeling more of the hurt that the teen has inflicted in the past. "Find someone you can talk to about this", she says gently. "Or this'll eat you up inside. I've done that to myself in the past. No one can do as much harm to you as easily as you can yourself. And… if you want, then…."
The Briton's voice trails off, rather than repeat a multiply-repeated offer that's never yet been taken up. "So… ahhhh. What'd you like to drink? A healthy fruit cocktail didn't exactly seem to appeal", she enquires, forcing a measure of fake good humour into her voice, while trying to dispel the worried frown from her features.
Colette leaves her back to Ygraine for a little bit, just staying quiet. It's not long enough to make it seem like she's ignoring her, though, just enough to make it a wonder. "The smoothie's fine, really… I don't drink soda or anything like that really." Rubbing at the side of her head, Colette turns and offers a weak smile, as much as she can muster. "I— I'm sorry about snapping at you. I just… M'not talking to anyone about this because— it's just— not something you talk about."
Swallowing tensely, Colette makes her way back towards Ygraine, but then passes right by her, moving almost like a circling shark, drawing a little bit closer every time she moves. "It— A lot happened when you were gone. A— lot of bad things." Dark brows crease together, and Colette stares down at her feet before looking back up to Ygraine. "You… don't need all of that on your conscience."
That last phrase really catches Ygraine's intention, the older woman very intently studying the younger, to try to discern whether Colette truly thinks that the Briton's conscience would be strained.
"Colette… I've told you things that could get me locked up several times over", she murmurs. "I've told you that I've spent time in an asylum, about discovering that I was gay, about my abilities, about… things I did for the Club…. What on Earth is there that's more revealing than what I've told you and what you've told me?"
While pacing back and forth with her arms folded, Colette closes her eyes and comes to a stop. She stays frozen in that position for a moment, then bites down at her lower lip. One hand comes up, wiping at her eyes, "I— " But just as soon as she was about to explain, she cutes herself off and shakes her head rapidly. "I'm— sorry I— " The fingers of one of her hands curl tightly closed against her palm, head hanging down and eyes shutting.
"I just don't— " Her voice is higher, a squeak at the end when she shuts herself up and a tightening of her throat accompanies it. The whole posture is obvious, the whole tone, she's made herself cry.
Ygraine sighs heavily - then inwardly curses herself for letting that be audible - before stepping forward to enfold Colette in a tight (if sweat-scented) hug. "I'm sorry", she murmurs, softly, voice gentle… though her grip is tight, the woman having no intention of letting the girl go unless she strenuously resists the affection. Instead, she pulls Colette against her, planting a kiss on her hair, but letting her keep what privacy she has, with her back against Ygraine's front and her face hidden from view.
It's too easy for the fact of a hug to break what little restraint Colette was managing to keep together. The girl makes a token effort to squirm away at first, then just shudders silently before letting out a choked sob. Her arms cross, hands moving up to rest across the backs of Ygraine's forearms, and her legs bend a little at the knee as she lets out this faint whining sound, followed by another sob. "M'sorry…" She manages to get out, shaking her head and moving her hands to feverishly try and wipe at her eyes "Fuck, m'sorry, I— " she's squirming again, wiping at her eyes with the heels of her palms, trying her level best to look tough despite herself.
Ygraine allows herself another sigh, though this one is a gentle exhalation into Colette's hair, which then receives a gentle nuzzle. "Yeah. You really need to apologise", she murmurs, keeping Colette's back pressed against her. "Fancy being human! And new to having to cope with this sort of life. And to having experiences you've never had before. And for living in a fucked-up city in a fucked-up country in fucked-up times for the whole screwed-up world. Yeah, you so badly need to apologise. You're dreadful, you are."
"I held someone at gunpoint…" Colette whispers with that strain of emotion on the edges of her voice, "I spent weeks hunt— hunting him down, I got a gun, and— " Trembling in Ygraine's arms, Colette's legs go weak again, another sob struggles to get out, but she's trying her damndest not to let it go. "I— I didn't— " she sucks back her words, hitching breath in the back of her throat making it hard to speak. She grows quiet, tense; she doesn't want this to come out, but it looks like it's going to happen regardless.
Ygraine manages to avoid audibly sucking in her breath, but her lower lip does get bitten rather hard at the news that Colette hunted someone. When the girl's legs go weak, she spends a few moments inwardly debating… then releases her, shifts her grip, and applies her power - drawing the skin-and-bones young woman into her arms as Colette is no longer pulled towards the Earth but instead towards the Briton. Letting gravity revert to normal - and with it the orientation of Colette's hair, clothes, and organs - she carries the girl around the kitchenette's counter and to the sofa, where she lets the extra burden carry her down onto the sofa.
"What didn't you do?"
It's an odd, disorienting feeling — the inverted pull of gravity. However brief it is, Colette seems to churn some at the motion, and only once she's rightly oriented back in a world where down is down and up is up and not also down, Colette manages to sink to the sofa without any tottering or wobbling in the process. Pulling her knees up to her chest, she wraps her arms tightly around them, striped socks pressing into the leather of the upholsty. She doesn't look like she likes talking about this — at all.
"I didn't do anything!" Is Colette's sharply barked response, "That— That's the problem! I— I didn't do it! I couldn't do it! And do you know what he did, what he did when I let him go? He killed more people!" Colette's voice is like a sharp knife the way it is wielded, brandished about to keep anything from getting close. "I— I could've saved— I— " She looks like she's going to be sick, then just buries her face against the backs of her knees, letting out a ragged sob.
"So you're several grades of humanity above a serial killer", Ygraine says quietly, shifting to curl up in the corner of the sofa, turning to face Colette beside her. "So you found that your morality mattered more when it really counted than the temptation to do the easy thing. Violence is so often the easy way out, Colette. It's the temptation to say "really, I'm a good person - but just this once I'll do something that I say I abhor. Because it's justified, this time. And I won't ever do it again… unless I find another situation like this one."
Shaking her head, Ygraine allows herself another sigh. "There are very few people who have the courage not to: who have the chance, who have the opportunity, who have the ability… and who choose not to. Because once you've done it once, it can change you. Oh, it can so easily change you. Because if you do it and it didn't break you, then why would doing it again once more change you? Or twice more? Or twenty times more? Only when justified, of course."
Reaching out, the Briton cautiously tries to take hold of Colette's shoulder. "The vast majority of mass-killers in the world claimed they were doing what was necessary or good, Colette. And there are very good reasons why an ancient teacher who taught that we should turn the other cheek was hailed by some of his followers as the son of God himself. Not hurting people is so much harder a choice than hurting them. Anger, temptation, fear… they can all drive you towards it. But killing someone… that can change you forever. And it'll so very rarely be for the better."
Colette pulls away from the hand, sheerly out of stubbornness and hot-headed resentment on her own level. She slides off the sofa, one foot touching the floor. "Tell that to their families!" She shouts out, both hands animatedly waving around as she does. "He's the one that burned down Joseph's church! He's the one that hung Joseph and Felix and killed that poor woman! He's the one who killed Mage and everyone at that safehouse!" Most of that is news, especially Felix Ivanov being one of the people hung that day.
"I— I could've saved her! I could've— I had him, I spent weeks I— I couldn't do it. I couldn't/ fucking do it when it mattered //most!" Looking overwrought with guilt from her decision, Colette stares out at Ygraine, covering her omuth with one hand as she looks away, pacing back and forth before moving back to the couch. "I— I can't look my dad in the eye anymore! I— I can't— I could've stopped him from hurting more people— I knew what he was going to do and I— " her voice cuts off, "I could've told the cops where he'd be. I could've— I— I wanted to do it myself and I fucked up. I fucking fucked up!"
"When you mattered most you were human, Colette. And humane. Maybe you could have done something to stop him - but the flaw wasn't that you didn't kill him. That's the easy, stupid, evil way out. You hate him for killing and for attempting to kill. Killing is evil. If you want to beat yourself up, beat yourself up for not being imaginative enough", Ygraine says, with real vehemence in her voice, though she still talks quietly.
"Maybe there was some way you could have stopped him. But I am proud of your morality, Colette. You're a better person than I was when it came to it. When I found myself with a gun in hand, I pulled the trigger. I took the easy way out, and I took the shot and I hit someone. And I wish to goodness that I'd had the wit and intelligence and foresight and any damn other thing that would have let me avoid that. Because I still have nightmares about how he looked when I hit him and how easy it was to do it."
"I didn't want to be good, I just— wanted him dead." Colette's jaw trembles as she says that, both of her hands rubbing at her eyes as she takes a few steps away from the sofa, slow and fumbling ones. "I wanted him t'pay for what he did to all those people, I don't— I don't care if it was the right thing to do, I— I still don't!" It's not delivered so much as a short, as it is sharply. "I couldn't— I couldn't do it because I knew I'd never be able to explain it— never— be able t'look at my dad again after doing that."
"I didn't— It wasn't because I thought it was wrong, it just— I— " Colette looks away, sniffling as her hand continues to wipe at her cheek. "Fuck I thought I'd stopped getting upset 'bout this… m'sorry…" Quieter, now, Colette turns her green eyes over to Ygraine, brows furrowed anxiously as she reconsiders what the brit said. "I don' know what t'tell Joseph…"
"If you only did it because you thought people would like you for it, then it wouldn't be morality - it'd mean nothing more than some silly schoolgirl changing her hairstyle to imitate a celebrity", Ygraine says tiredly. "What you've described… you couldn't bear to take a life, because you knew that true goodness - which you see in your father - would make you too ashamed to bear it."
The Briton shakes her head again. "Remember that ancient teacher I mentioned? Joseph follows him. If he's worth his salt, he'll be at least as pleased with your moral courage as I am."
Colette doesn't seem so sure of that, and it shows in her expression. "I… haven't talked to him since he disappeared." Now she's massaging at her forehead, tense all over and equal parts stiff in her motions. "I didn't mean to— bring this up." There's no real reconciliation in her tone, just a struggle to get calm again. She can't look at Ygraine, not completely, and instead affords her a peripheral glance, and then starts making her way around the couch and back towards the kitchen, for wont of her feet to do something other than sit and her mind to occupy itself.
"I… I'm sorry for bringing all this up," she mumbles, almost a little too quiet for the distance. Given what she talked about, though, however briefly it was, it seems like this might have been part of whatever it is she's gone through that has changed her in the last month. "I… wont bring it up again."
"Whyever not?", Ygraine asks quietly, tracking Colette as she moves. "Because tearing yourself apart is too much fun? Because ripping yourself to shreds will help you to make amends? Because hiding this from the people you care about will mean that you can pretend they're too stupid to notice and that they're not going to worry themselves silly every time they see how much you're suffering?"
Slouching at the verbal rebuking she receives, Colette closes her eyes and hangs her head. "I didn't— " she cuts herself off, arms folded around herself as she stares down at her feet. "I— " words come difficult, at least one that have any meaning. "I didn't mean to— hurt you." It's not the first time she's had to say that either. "I'm sorry." Quiet, those ones are, disappointment in herself a far more prominent thing than any other emotion at the moment. "I— I never meant— "
She starts to move again, this time not for the couch but for the door. A teenager's perrogative to run at the first sign of difficulty, and for all that Colette seems like she's grown up in the last few months, there's still that emotional inexperience at hand that comes with youth, still that desire to run when the going gets tough.
Ygraine manages to resist the temptation to sigh yet again, instead glaring momentarily at Colette's gloomily-retreat, before she vaults over the sofa and darts over to catch up.
"Stop running away", she says quietly. "At least from the people who love you. You'll find that life's better if you don't try to shoulder everything on your own."
Colette ducks her head when she hears the thump of feet on the floor and Ygraine hustling to catch up. The smaller girl had only managed to get herself a few feet from the door, and her motion arrests once she hears the Brit coming to catch up. She doesn't turn around, not immediately anyway. "I… I'm not good at this." Is her weakly voiced response, fingers curling into the fabric of her shirt as she hunches her shoulders and hesitantly turns around, looking side-long at Ygraine, teeth pinching down on her bottom lip.
"No. You're not", Ygraine agrees with laughter in her voice, before her hands reach for Colette's shoulders. "You're bloody awful at it, in truth. You tear yourself up over so many crazy things that you can't even give yourself space and time to come to terms with one of the most important moments of your life."
Leaning down a touch, she brings her eyes onto the same level as Colette's. "Not that you have worked to establish a track record of that, or anything."
It's with a regretful acceptance that Colette manages a laugh at that, smiling awkwardly even as she looks away, a touch embarassed at the notion. "I've never had anyone t'talk to about this, really. Not— since the last year. M'still not really used to it, being… being able to talk to someone." Without much hesitation, Colette clears the distance between herself and Ygraine, reaching up to rest a hand on the Brit's hand still on her shoulder. She smiles, then, a bit more honestly as her head quirks to the side.
"I… guess m'not used to knowing people care about me too. It's— new." The young girl's smile is bittersweet, and the grip on Ygraine's hand tenses before she lets it fall away.
"I… I don't think we agree, on— stuff. I just— I still feel really bad about what happened, about— " CLosing her eyes, it's clear it's not something she's going to get over right away. "I'm sorry I'm so clumbsy." In every way.
Ygraine allows herself a low, weak laugh. "I can bend your ear about it some more", she says gently. "But… gah. Come to me. With anything. I'll try to help. And if you really want to know how to stop people without needing to kill them, we can certainly work on that. Especially with your abilities there are so many options. But never, never, never beat yourself up for being too humane to kill. Never."
Ygraine tries to catch and hold Colette's gaze, before forcing a smile. "Or I'll have to beat you up to punish you for it."
Grimacing, Colette's gruff laugh is a little under-enthusiastic, but at least she can manage some measure of humor. "Thanks," she says softly, "I appreciate it. I just— I have a hard time being open with people." Her nose wrinkles up, "Not like you didn't know that by now, I mean." Shifting her weight to one foot, Colette's green eyes settle firmly on Ygraine, even as her head angles away a little, an assessing expression. "Um…" Her eyes avert, chin angles down, but her posture doesn't change. "I— I'm sorry if I made you feel— " she can't quite express it right, "You know— not important? I just— I deal with stuff on my own a lot 'cause it's… what I'm used to?"
"No, wait that— that sounds bad." Wrinkling her nose, COlette steps in and leans her head against Ygraine's shoulder. "I just— I don't want you to feel like you're not important, or— or that I don't really value your opinion if I keep stuff to myself. I'm… I just don't know how to deal, with anything."
"That sounds a bit more like it", Ygraine says with a soft smile, slipping her arms around Colette to deliver a hug. "Though you've come through a great deal more than you sometimes give yourself credit for. But you don't have to try to do it on your own. You have people who will help, if only you give us the chance. Accepting help isn't being weak, or burdening people. It's freely offered, and freely given. Don't feel that it's a bad thing to take it."
"I know…" It's a whisper that Colette offers, pressing her nose into Ygraine's shoulder briefly, "It's just hard. I— " She wrinkles her nose, leans back and furrows her brows. There's a smile, reluctant at first and then growing much larger before she breaks out into a brief giggle, shaking her head as her eyes sweep up and down Ygraine. "No hugs until you shower." About that, at least, she's adamant.
Ygraine sniggers, sticking her tongue out for a moment before disolving into laughter. Pulling back, she shakes her head. "WHy? Do you want to volunteer to wash my back?", she asks with a playful leer.
Starting towards the bathroom, she grandly waves a hand towards the living room and kitchenette. "As milady commands, so shall I do. Help yourself to a drink if you want one, and feel free to hunt through my DVD collection. The French stuff's in +that+ cabinet, and the English in that one. Though maybe I should show you Brotherhood of the Wolf, come to think of it…."
Tilting her head to the side, Colette gives Ygraine a crooked look and then a smirk. "I guess I can stay… a little while anyway." There's a furrow of Colette's brows as she considers the door, then looks back to Ygraine. "I— do— you think I should go see Joseph sometime? Maybe— maybe talk to him about— " Cutting herself off, Colette shakes her head and seems to have already convinced herself it's a terrible idea. She takes a step back, and begins winding her way towards the kitchen.
"I— I think I'm going to make myself something to eat and… try and not think about all of this for a while." There'a a pause as she comes to the kitchen entrance, looking back over her shoulder to Ygraine. "You mind if I raid some ice cream out of your freezer? I… think it's one of those nights."
Ygraine stops at the door to the bathroom, smile wholly fading as she gives Colette a level, very serious look. "Yes. Talk to Joseph. I'll come with you, if you like. Though I think that you should have the conversation itself with just him. From what I've heard of him, it might help you a lot. And it might be good for him, too."
Waving towards the freezer, she musters another smile. "Chocolate fudge and black forest are the flavours, I think, but feel free to rummage to see if there's anything I've forgotten about."
Offering a faint smile, Colette nods her head slowly. "Thanks, but… you're right. That's something I'm gonna— gonna have to face with just the two of us." Looking down to her feet, there's an awkward shuffle before the teen looks back up again and rests her shoulder against the wall. "Um— do— you mind if I stay here tonight? I— I don't want to have to drive all the way back to Staten Island…" and that implies that she doesn't want to go back to Judah's either. "I'm going to try and head into the ruins tomorrow to find Joseph, I— heard he's kinda' deep underground now…"
Then, with a wrinkle of her nose Colette adds, "literally."
"I can help you find him", Ygraine offers tentatively. "If you like. Mind your bike while you talk to him, if you want. And of course you can stay here. Now - you hunt for ice cream and see how terrible you think my DVD collection is, and I'll have that shower, okay?"
Nodding her head slowly, Colette smiles a little more honestly now. Her eyes wander to the bathroom door, for just a moment, and then she just slips into the kitchen with an impish grin on her lips to raid Ygraine's refrigerator. For now, she can forget about all of the problems of her life, the problems of the last month that she's struggled through and enjoy the company of a close friend. Tomorrow, however, she's going to need all of that rest and all of that reassurance she can get, to confront a pastor about her sins.
