Global News, May 5th, 2009

ARGENTINA — For the fifth straight week, Argentinian Military forces have been struggling with guerilla conflicts in the northwestern Catamarca Province on the border with Chile. Argentinian officials have stated that the identitiy of the guerilla fighters is unknown at this time. The conflict started when an Argentinian military transport shipping ordinance from the recently decomissioned Cordoba Air Force Base in Catamarca was ambushed by the guerilla fighters.

Defense Minitstry Press Representative Carlos deSandoria commented that the ordinance being transported was confiscated by the guerilla fighters who retreated into the Andes mountains on the border of Argentina and Chile. Forces from the Armed Forces of the Argentine Republic were immediately sent to investigate and recover the stolen armaments, when they were set upon by the guerillas.

For five weeks now, the conflict has continued to escalate between the Argentinian forces and the guerillas. While Bolivia and Peru have offered to lend assistance to the conflict, there is still no confirmed understanding of which nation the guerilla fighters are working for — if any — and where their actual operations are based out of. Their entrenchment in the Andes has made any ground gained against them staggeringly difficult for a nation that has seen more military cutbacks in the last five years than any other South American country.

President Cristina Fernández de Kirchner stated at a press conference on Monday that, "the deplorable actions of these criminals will not be tolerated, and that our government will pursue them to the full extent of our power." She later made a request to the United States Government to lend military assistance to Argentina in putting down this guerilla insurrection.

TIBET — Shortly after dawn, the bodies of over six thousand Tibetan men and women were discovered outside of the city of Barkam. United Nations officials have reported that all but fifteen of the dead have tested positive post-mortem for the Suresh Linkage Complex, the genes responsible for Evolved abilities. This marks the single largest anti-evolved genetic cleansing in the region.

A UN task force has been formed in order to investigate the origins of the remains, as the multi-ethnic mix of those found dead have led UN authorities to believe that the remains may have been moved from a separate site of execution.

United Nations representative Harold Marlowe cited this incident as one of many such incidents potentially being perpetrated on the Asian continent. All eyes have been pointing to China for months now, due to their publicized anti-evolved crackdown, and with this incident so close to home, it is leaving many wondering when the other shoe is going to drop.

RUSSIA - Students from the Tomsk State University in Siberia have begun a surprising project along with several members of the university faculty. They intend on re-examining the remains of famous Russian historical figure Grigori Rasputin, to test the DNA of Rasputin's remains for presence of the Suresh Linkage Complex to put to rest centuries of debate over the potential super-human abilities of the "Mad Monk" himself.

Professor Nikolai Burdenko has commented on the student's project as "a fascinating look into our country's storied past, and a potentially new and exciting window into the past if the DNA tests prove to be positive.

Word of this experiment has sent a whirlwind of interest through the global scientific community, with plans put in place to test the remains of many purported "superhuman" historic figures to begin to find proof-positive of the presence of the Evolved in ancient history.

Results of the testing on Grigori Rasputin's remains are expected in December.

IRAN - Tragedy was narrowly averted today at the Imam Khomeini International Airport in Tehran this morning when Iran Air flight 595 suffered mid-air engine failure on its descent towards the airport carrying 375 passengers. Communications to the radio tower at Imam Khomeini International Airport indicated that the plane had been suffering from unexpected difficulties with its right wing engines, when all four engines of the Boeing 737 shut down simultaneously.

However, the tragedy was averted when a single unidentified passenger of the airline was able to remove every passenger and both the pilot and co-pilot from the plane through means of an unknown Evolved ability.

all 375 passengers miraculously landed just outside of the Imam Khomeini airport and watched in horror as their plane exploded upon impact with the runway.

Iran Air officials are calling this event "miraculous" and are actively seeking the identity of the Evolved individual who saved the passengers.

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