I Have A Cunning Plan


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Scene Title I Have A Cunning Plan
Synopsis Tony thinks up several cunning plans to stop the release of Vanguard's virus.
Date January 6, 2009

The Garden

The kitchen is a goodly size, with plenty of counter space. The walls have been painted a sunny yellow, in an attempt to add warmth and energy. The main appliances are older than the minor ones, which look brand-new. While someone has managed to scrub the place clean, the kitchen needs something new on the floor and something to sit at better than a folding table and chairs. The small window over the sink has a decent view of part of the yard.

Tony is staring thoughtfully at a map, and at some timetables when you return. He barely looks up, but asks, "Okay… so… do we have any idea for when it's going to be released. Where?"

Jezebel says, "I don't know where, other than the main city. Hana said maybe as soon as the end of this month. Eve stopped by last night while you were digesting all that food. Her latest precog says that it's still going to get loose."

Tony says, “Mmmm. So. Yeah. I was thinking, where would I kick it out, if I was mad. Mass transit, I reckon.”

Jezebel says, “That's the weird part. Hana says they bought high-velocity howitzers to deliver the stuff with.”

Tony grunts, "Okay. So… we've got to be able to find that shit, surely?"

Jezebel sighs. "No one's had any luck so far. Multiple shipping addresses, remember?"

Tony says, “How about the rest… the gunpowder… or whatever the hell fires them? Or whoever's going to turn them into fireable projectiles, rather than just cooking the bugs?”

Jezebel says, “You need to ask Hana these things. I don't know. I'm sure she's working on it. I suspect she's getting nowhere.”

Tony groans, quietly, "Alright. So…. what do we need… Oh.. have you got a picture of our main man?"

Jezebel says, “I don't. Hana might. I know, I know, I'll ask Hana to meet with you.”

Tony says, “Yeah… yeah, please do. Because.. uh… worst comes to the worst, I could let some informer or other see him do something illegal, to attract attention to him..”

Jezebel says, “Ugh. Hmm. If you do that, I hope his buddies don't freak out when he gets arrested. From what you said, they might need somewhere to assemble things. I don't know if they can just use a few tools, or they'll need to weld. I do know that I'd stick the containment site and the mortars out in the middle of nowhere, just to keep people from tripping over them.”

Tony says, “Uh… yeah. Fuck…. yeah… fuck.. that's not so great an idea. Last resort, I guess." He rubs his chin. "Maybe I could forge up some documents for cops to find, mentioning the mortars, and the guy, and let them make the running….”

Jezebel says, “How good a forger are you?”

Tony wavers a hand, "Not great, I'm afraid. This has kind of made me lazy. But…. and this is another option… I could maybe fake something up, and then have the cop feel it tugged from their hand by a gust of wind, to go off, sailing into the blue, or something, you know?"

Jezebel says, “I think they should get to keep the document. Maybe I'll make an anonymous call to the CDC. They're the only people I know who could handle the virus safely.”

Tony says, “Yeah… except them getting a forgery that the worked out was one would be worse than them having no document at all. Because they'd doubt it was true.”

Jezebel says, “No forgeries, then.”

Tony says, “Yeah. No forgeries. But one they didn't get to keep because… well… it blew out of their hand and into the harbor… that might do it.”

Jezebel says, “No, they'll need to be able to pass it around and stare at it.”

Tony sighs, and nods, "Yeah." A beat. "What about… oh… what's he called….. Cartman? What if he got a look at it?"

Jezebel says, “Who are you thinking of?”

Tony says, “The Security Guy… the scary one. Fat guy…. used to be a cop.”

Jezebel says, “I don't know of such a person. Not surprising. Lest we forget, Homeland Security has already been informed.”

Tony says, “Y-e-e-es. But do they believe? You know? I mean, surely this sounds too far fetched for them, doesn't it?”

Jezebel slumps. "I think they'd have to take it seriously, but I just don't know. All I can do is prepare for the worst. Maybe I'll go help the engineers."

Tony stands, to gently gather you into his arms, "Would you help? Or would you get in their way, right now?"

Jezebel hugs back. "Probably get in their way."

Tony rubs your back, "Well then… I'd kinda like my foxhole to be safe, if we've gotta go there… so let 'em get on with it, you know?"

Jezebel says, “I suppose. I wish I could do more.”

Tony says, “Yeah…. me too. I'm just…. I can plant the…. oh!" He grins, suddenly, "We could steal the guns, or divert them or something, and let him try and fire them from fakes, and think it's worked?"

Jezebel says, “I'd much rather grab and destroy the virus. Stealing the guns is a very temporary solution at best.”

Tony says, “Yeah, but once he's gone off to gloat, leaving the virus behind, THEN we can grab it and destroy it. So…. find the gun site, and we're okay.”
He doesn't mention this would rely on him being out, and within at most fifty feet of ground zero for a major biological warfare attempt, with no certainty of success.

Jezebel doesn't know about the technical difficulties. "I don't know how to find where the mortars are going to be loaded, or fired. Maybe Hana knows someone who does."

Tony says, “Yeah…. yeah, me either. Like I say, I don't do guns, big or small, so… somewhere. But someone'll know.”

Jezebel snuggles close. "Is it mental health break time?"

Tony says, “Mental… health… breaktime?”

Jezebel says, “Time to do something completely different before we go crazy?”

Tony says, “Yeah! Yeah, that sounds a plan!”

Jezebel shyly says, "You can tell me about yourself for a change, or you can hug me and stroke the hair on my head… "

Tony does opt for the latter, although he eventually says, "I'm boring…. there's nothing much to tell, you know?"

January 6th: Yoda, I am Not
January 6th: Strangers in Vans
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