National News June 19 2009

GEORGIA — Thirty-six students in Atlanta Georgia narrowly avoided death today when their school bus was involved in a twenty-six car pileup on Interstate 95 at 2:26PM Eastern Time. The traffic accident, started by an overturned tractor trailer truck, would have been disastrous were it not for the sudden manifestation of one of the highschool children's Evolved abilities. The child, who's name is being withheld due to his status as a minor, displaced himself and all of the children on his bus, along with the driver and five peope in adjacent vehicles nearly six miles northwest of the Interstate in the blink of an eye.

This miraculous rescue came as a shock to not only the individuals involved, but also the parents of the minor. After the incident, the young boy was tested at a government facility in Atlanta and, unsurprisingly, tested positive for the Suresh Linkage Complex. His parents declined comment when approached, and the Georgia State Police indicate that the damage done to the school bus at the moment of impact was not compounded by the sudden evacuation of the driver.

MISSOURI — Police in the small down of Rock Port Missouri are staggered tonight after their police station suffered severe fire damage from what they suspect is "probably pro-evolved and anti-registration sentiments" that have sprung up in the state. Four teenage minors and one adult — Clarke Duncan (18) — created six improvised explosives designed to set the police station (which doubles as that town's office of Evolved Registration) on fire. Only four of the six improvised explosives ignited, but the damage was allegedly compounded by one of the minors unregistered Evolved abilities to manipulate and control lit flames. Rock Port Fire and Rescue arrived on the scene shortly after Rock Port Police managed to catch the teens as they fled the scene using police dogs.

The five teens are facing criminal terrorism charges and conspiracy to subvert government authority. Reports from the scene indicate that graffiti bearing the image of an orange bird and the slogan "Rise Up", attributed to the pro-evolved organization "Phoenix" is being investigated.

NEW HAMPSHIRE — Legislation proposed in the Granite State, home of former President-Elect Allen Rickham, is threatening to challenge the Linderman Act. Senator Miles Wright (D) has proposed a countermand to the Linderman Act within the boundaries of New Hampshire, effectively attempting to make Registration of Evolved abilities a voluntary act.

While Registration is considered mandatory for all government employees, the United States Government has not been aggressively pursued. Wright's proposed legislation would make it illegal for the government to force a resident of the state of New Hampshire to register under the Linderman Act if it became known that they were an Evolved Citizen.

Opponents to Wright's agenda cite the recent upswing in Evolved violence across the world as proof that knowing and tracking the identities, abilities and whereabouts of Evolved individuals is a necessity for the security of the United States and — like many proponents of the Linderman Act — liken the act of Registration to a liscense to own and operate a firearm.

MARYLAND — Surprised organizers of a food drive for families fallen on hard economic times were given a substantial and anonymous donation of food yesterday. Sixteen truckloads of canned foods and frozen foods were delivered to the Salvation's Light Church in Baltimore overnight, along with a letter allegedly written by "Concerned Parties" that have stated their association with the Pro-Evolved organization "Phoenix". The letter indicated that the donated food was legitimately obtained by merit of Evolved ability, but Baltimore Police are investigating the food delivery as a potential theft, and have suspended the delivery of the food to the various Food Pantries around Maryland pending conclusion of their investigation.

VIGRINIA — The town of Abingdon, Virginia was shaken up this morning by a terrifying 5.1 magnitude earthquake, despite Abingdon's lack of proximity to any active fault lines. The Abington Police Station was broght to ruin by the quake, shaken to its foundations killing sixteen officers and four individuals held overnight for disorderly conduct. One of the men, Norman White, has not been seen since the earthquake and is wanted under suspicion of involvement by the Department of Homeland Security.

Unless otherwise stated, the content of this page is licensed under Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike 3.0 License