What Did You Think I Wanted?


elisabeth_icon.gif trask_icon.gif

Scene Title What Did You Think I Wanted?
Synopsis A candid conversation about happiness.
Date January 8, 2009

Trask's Apartment

Elisabeth lets herself into Norton's apartment yet again, knocking twice before she does so. "Hey," she calls into the place. "I brought lunch. You hungry?" She looks around to see where he is as she sets lunch down on the counter and removes her outer coat and blazer, leaving her shoulder holster on. She's wearing a lot of dark colors today — black pants and shoes, black blazer and jacket. Even her dark green blouse is not lightening up the color scheme much. "Norton?"

Trask is in the kitchen, it seems there is a bit of black smoke coming from the stove, as he is trying to get something burning off of it, which might be commical in his one armed, hopping way, or maybe just tragic.

"Norton, what *are* you doing?" Liz moves over to where he's attempting to….. cook? And she gently nudges him to the side while she takes the burning pan off the hot burner, hissing a little when the handle of it burns her slightly. "Damn!" She drops it quickly on a turned-off burner and then looks at him. "Are you trying to burn the place down?" she asks with an edge of amusement.

Trask looks a bit sheepish, "I was just…trying to…."

Elisabeth smiles at him. "You know… just because you've got mad cooking skills normally doesn't mean you're up to trying to cook with bullets in you." She peers into the hot pan, glancing at him to ask, "What was it?" Because it's a little black now.

Trask says, "Ramen…" He looks down very embarassed."

There's a pause, and Liz says quietly, "You burned Ramen noodles?" Shaking her head, she puts her hands on him and gently steers him back to the couch. "Clearly the pain meds are getting to you. C'mon. I brought Thai. You can eat it with a fork."

Trask gets a seat on the couch, putting his leg up some. "I….yeah I wasn't watching it too closely.

Elisabeth helps him get settled comfortably, and then she heads to the kitchen for plates, forks, and the food she left on the counter. Coming back in, she uses his coffee table to start dishing out the savory-smelling concoctions. "What's on your mind, Norton? Or is it just the meds?"

Trask says, "I didn't expect it to take me so long to get back to it…I thought I was better at getting across the room."

"Okay," Elisabeth replies. And then she grins. "So now you know, hopalong, that you're not going to be able to walk away from whatever you heat up for lunch and stuff. I mean… I can't be here every time you want to eat…. and I'd hate to find you burning your apartment down," she teases a bit as she hands him a plate.

Trask smiles and takes the food, looking at it, "I know..I should make more sandwiches.

With a laugh, Liz replies easily, "No… I should bring you the casseroles I have stashed in my freezer from the week *I* was laid up so you aren't stuck with sandwiches constantly." She looks apologetic. "I'll bring them tonight," she promises. "I'm sorry I didn't think of it sooner…and I'm sorry I didn't make it by last night."

Trask says, "It's ok…how did things go? You said everything worked out?"

Elisabeth grimaces and says around a bite of pad Thai, "Yeah… it went great. Will ripped me a new ass for lying to him, Abby fucking well told him that I knew who Wu-Long and Ethan were, and I had to convince him that Conrad's my source. Then I had dinner with my partner, because in all honesty? I think he'd be a huge asset to Phoenix, we need all the ex-soldiers we can get our hands on right now. And … I like him." She looks at Norton. "I genuinely just plain like the guy. He'll be a damn good partner; he'll watch my back. I think you'll like him too, when you meet him. And then I went and briefed Con on the sheer volume of information that I had to give to Will so he could work out what NOT to say. I'd rather not get my ass jammed up by HomeSec." She shakes her head and takes another bite, her tone just a little bitter and a little angry. "And I didn't stop in after that because I got up first thing this morning and went to rip Abigail a new ass and tell her to keep her damn mouth shut from now on. I don't know why Will's all over me — why he thinks I know so much. All I did was give him Helena's disk. But he's been climbing all over me like ivy on bricks since I got on the squad."

Trask says, "He smells something and figures he can worry his bone till you admit it."

Elisabeth stops eating, her plate in her hand and her elbows resting on her knees while she eats, and looks at him. "The question is… how far do I trust him? He's given some indications that he's okay with using the gray side of the law. Look what he did to Abby — either he's totally clueless and doesn't realize that what he did to her is totally illegal. Which I'm not buying, he's too smart for that. He's always been REALLY by-the-book — or he's leaning far more our direction than you might think. And I don't know which it is…. and to be brutal, I *don't* trust him to be able to live in the gray. He's the NYPD's poster child. And I don't know how important that status is to him. He could toss us to the wolves to stay in their good graces."

Trask says, "I wouldn't trust him, It's not worth it I don't think."

Elisabeth smiles faintly. "You don't think anyone is worth trusting," she tells him in an affectionate tone. "It's what makes you good at what you do. Though I do want you to take some time and do some vetting on Darius Johnson for me."

Trask says, "I will…when I get acsess to my info…that could be a few weeks though. And no…noone is worth trusting your saftey too."

Elisabeth grins a little. "Yeah, yeah…. don't get crazy overprotective on me, okay?" She leaves her fork on her plate and reaches out to touch him lightly. "My safety is not always the first priority. It can't be." And then she picks her fork back up to start eating again. Around bites, she says, "I need to see Teo, too. Soon."

Trask says, "I know…I'm sorry"

Elisabeth shrugs slightly. "Don't keep apologizing to me." She eyes him. "What can I do to help you feel better? Cuz you look all kinds of … I dunno. Weird. You keep on apologizing again. I don't want you to apologize… not for your feelings, and not for the way you act. We've been doing it too much lately."

Trask says, "I'm so…" He bites his off and grins, "Ok….I stop now."

Elisabeth tilts her head. "You're so what?" She grins.

Trask says, "I was going to apologize for apologizeing…."

Elisabeth rolls her eyes. He gets the 'REALLY' look. And then she just eats her lunch with a faint smirk. "Eat," she tells him. "I'm not listening to apologies from you anymore — you're my friend, you've been my friend for years. I realize that I've done some changing in the past couple of years and that I'm changing yet again on you… but it doesn't require apologies on either of our parts."

Trask chuckles and eats spending a few minutes in silence, pleasant silence.

In the silence, Liz finds the same kind of companionship with him that they've always shared and she settles back against the back of the couch to eat with him in the comfortable space. "Are you driving yourself crazy in the house?"

Trask says, "a little, yeah. it's kinda been…..oppressive."

Elisabeth grins a little. "Now you see why I cooked the whole couple of weeks." She moves to set her plate on the coffee table, and then leans back to settle on the couch with him again, her elbow on the back of the couch and her hand in her hair. "What can I do for you? Anything to make it better?"

Trask shakes his head, "Just being here is more then enough." He smiles and sets his own plate aside, setting his head on your shoulder.

Elisabeth curls up with him, running a hand through his hair while he rests there, her head resting on top of his. "I'm sorry…. things were a little easier when I was a teacher, huh?"

Trask says, "Easier how?" He smiles, "You weren't happy being a teacher…you liked to pretend you were…but…." He smiles and looks over at you, kissing your cheek."

With a little time in retrospect, Elisabeth asks softly, "How long did you know that I was unhappy before *I* knew it?"

Trask says, "I don't know…I…knew you weren't…complete…but I didn't know what you needed to make it right. It was very frustrating….it's one of the reasons why when you asked me out I agreed so quickly…I thought it might help…somehow."

With her head still resting against his, Elisabeth smiles faintly. "So instead of saying something to me, you figured I needed …. what? To get laid? Get married?" She doesn't sound upset, merely curious about his thought processes.

Trask says, "I didn't know what was wrong…so instead of picking at you….of making you feel worse, I tried to fix it…."

Elisabeth mms softly, and she kisses his forehead since he's got his head on her shoulder again. "I thought I was living a life, you know," she says quietly. "It took a long time for me to realize that I wasn't happy. Probably… not really until about four months ago. If you think the slurs against Evolved are bad on the street or in the precinct, it's actually worse in the schools. The kids that get found out by other kids are harassed pretty unmercifully, and the teachers aren't much better. Most of them try. But there are always a few in the bunch. Madame Saugnier… she was amazing. I think she must have known I was Evolved, though perhaps her assessment on what KIND of Evolved was a bit off. I'm pretty sure she knew it was voice-related, but she thought it was my music itself. She once called me a siren."

Elisabeth grins a little. "Mainly because my classes were usually calmer than most."

Trask smiles softly, "Nothing wrong with that, right?

Elisabeth shrugs a bit. "No… nothing wrong, I suppose. She was…." She pauses. "If you want the truth, knowing what I know now, I suspect she may have been with the Ferrymen. I don't know, though. She died in the explosion at the school, I think." She pauses and says quietly, "Some part of me wishes I could have been the teacher you liked better."

Trask says, "The teacher I liked better? What makes you think I liked you better as a teacher? Or as a cop? I like you, not what you do. I like that you are happy with your job, I like that you believe in yourself again."

Elisabeth leans a little away so she can look at him. "Because the teacher-Liz who was not registered kept her head down a lot. I'm realizing that I've sort of felt like I was …. a fugitive or something. Living in hiding. Staying low-key all the time, trying not to draw attention. Being nice to people all the time, walking away from anything that might remotely make me take action. It's a rather sobering view of my last two years. And you're a quiet, low-key kind of man…. and you're always apologizing for things; for wanting to coddle me, for stifling me. But I don't think it was you who did it….. I think I let you do it because it made me feel safe. And it wasn't very fair of me. And now I sort of…. feel like… " She pauses, it's hard to explain. "Like I'm not the person I made you think I was, and that somehow I'm going to drive you away because of it. I'm going to do things that hurt you."

Trask shakes his head, "Your not going to drive me away. You may try…but it's not going to happen. I don't need to protect you….I kind of like the idea of protecting you, but I don't need to. You are an intelligenct, independent woman, who can take care of herself. If anything I might fear you don't need me any more.

Elisabeth smiles faintly. "There's a difference, you know…. I may not need the kind of support you've offered me since the Bomb. But that doesn't mean I don't need you in my life."

Trask takes a deep breath, savoring your smell, "I know…It's just my insecurities getting to me, we are all allowed to be insecure sometimes, even super woman.

Elisabeth chuckles softly, kissing him very lightly. "Oh, I'm insecure all right." She smiles a little. "I'm insecure enough to worry that you gave me enough leash to hang myself and by God, I'm likely gonna do it," she says with a grimace. "And I'm probably going to burn you along the way. But I'm unwilling to do what you did… and let you go."

Trask raises an eyebrow "Let me go? Where exactly am I going?"

Elisabeth grins at him and says, "Guess that's up to you."

Trask leans up and kisses you, tenderly, but with a little hunger hiding in it.

There's a hitch in her breath when he kisses her like that, and Elisabeth savors the moment. There are so many things she could say to him right now, and all of them spill through her mind. What she chooses to say, however, is a soft whisper. "Don't let me hurt you. For God's sake, Norton. It would kill me." And then she invites a deeper kiss by sliding her other arm up to his face as she kisses him back.

Trask smiles and strokes your cheek, speaking, his lips close to yours, his breath on your lips, "I won't…you won't…"

If only she were so sure. But Elisabeth has to have faith that he can handle himself, and that whatever comes… they're adults. He knows her faults. "Okay," she whispers back. The kiss is soft, but she's clearly happy to go ahead and let it go as far as Norton's willing. Yeah, she's only on her lunch break, but well…..

Trask kisses this time with no holds bared, he lets the kiss deepen, fire and passion taking over completely.

Elisabeth closes her eyes and reluctantly lets go of the coherent mindset. She follows his lead — he's the one who's hurt, so he gets to call halt whenever.

Trask breaks the kiss after a rather long moment, "I think you need to head back to work….because I think I might have to learn from the Ramen…on how long it takes me to navigate around. And really….it doesn't count as a quickie then.

Elisabeth laughs out loud at him, and extricates herself from the embrace gracefully. "You're a nut," she tells him, kissing him on the nose lightly. And then she takes the trash out of his way, brings him a drink, and slips out to go back to work.

January 8th: Tinkerbell
January 8th: From Emo To Absurd
Unless otherwise stated, the content of this page is licensed under Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike 3.0 License